Hooked by Les Edgerton

I’m somewhat selective when it comes to craft books. Sometimes I feel like most Indie-Authors spend more time reading craft books on writing than they do writing. And let’s not forget about the money spent. As for self-help books for authors, I have a scant but awesome collection. I usually spend a lot of time reading blogs, taking notice of titles mentioned, and then taking aim for that special book.

My first chapter was bugging me. After we (The Queen and I) would edit about eight chapters, we’d discover something new and start all over again. Well, I can comfortably say that now I feel as if we’ve finally “got it.” Yes, the “Queen” and I were doing an awesome job, but we were still treating the first chapter like any other…big mistake, and thank God we had the intuition not to publish.

I took one of Kristen Lamb’s on-line seminars concerning “Your First Five Pages.” As I look back upon the seminar, it was very informative and helpful. Later, she made a blog post about first chapters and recommended “Hooked” by Les Edgerton.

Like a vigilant and eager student, I clicked over to Amazon and purchased Edgerton’s “Hooked,” and a copy Kristen Lamb’s “Rise of the Machines: Human Authors in a digital world” (still reading this one).

After reading “Hooked,” everything that Kristen explained during the seminar became crystal clear. I guess I needed time to absorb at my own pace. After all, I haven’t been a student for a millennium or two…well maybe three. O.k. you can stop laughing at me now. 🙂

Within Hooked by Les Edgerton, the “crafty” author-coach will explain to you the importance of an opening line, the first page, the first plot points, and yes, how they all coagulate into a rockin’ first chapter. Also, how to introduce a character, and the incredibly sticky subject concerning backstory, i.e., when to use it and when to avoid it.

On another note, Edgerton delivers with a style that keeps you reading and entertained. It would seem that he took his own advice.:-) Let’s face it; this subject in the wrong hands could turn drier than dust faster than a teenager can answer a text-message. But with Edgerton, the read is smooth sailing.

I can give “Hooked” by Les Edgerton a hearty and well-deserved recommendation. Also, you should check out Kristen Lamb’s blog and take one of her classes too.

What are some of your favorite writing-craft books?

Anaphora Paragraphing?

 

A dictionary definition of “Anaphora” would state, the repetition of a word or phrase at the beginning of successive verses, clauses, or paragraphs.

“We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and on the streets, we shall fight in the hills.” – Winston Churchill

“This blessed plot, this Earth, this realm, this England.” – William Shakespeare

From the above examples, you can see how this technique is used for a heightened dramatic effect.

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Try to refrain from over using anaphora as well. In “Storm of Divine Light,” I properly used the technique twice in 376 pages.

Excerpt: Patrons never suspected the humble servant Dagorat once had another name. A name he had tried to bury; an infamous name which struck terror into the hearts of travelers and merchants alike. Blackmond Moonshadow, the most notorious rogue who ever wreaked havoc upon the distant Kingdom of Easterly.

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The word “paragraph” in the definition poses a bit of a problem. Other language / writing guru’s like Hofmann referred to the paragraph as a natural barrier to anaphora. Creativity Hacker refers to starting paragraphs with the same word whether consecutively or just too often as “Echoing Headwords.” This concept seems to apply to both paragraphs and consecutive sentences.

Let’s say that your MC is named Lisa. Imagine the paragraphs on one page starting as follows.

Lisa grabbed…

Lisa looked…

She stepped on…

The dog barked…

Lisa hurried….

She opened…

Lisa went…

*Psst…I know that most of the sentence starters above seem like an assault of declarative sentences, but that is the subject for another blog post.

As you can see, beginning paragraphs with repeated words just doesn’t work very well. Unlike adverbs, where the usage rate is one for every five to seven pages, I couldn’t find the acceptable rate of repetition concerning echoing headwords.

It would be quite a daunting task to complete a novel with every paragraph starting with a different word. I went back into some drafts to find a rate of repetition in my own #writing. I found that you can repeat the start of a paragraph every other page, or at least eight to ten paragraphs apart, as long as they are not on the same page.

As for sentences, try not to use the same “headword” consecutively or bunched too close together.

Have you found evidence of this faux pas in some of your drafts?

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Camp NaNoWriMo 2016

I know that some don’t give the April #CampNaNoWriMo the same attention as the main NaNoWriMo event in November. However, I am going to approach 2016’s Camp NaNo with all of the same seriousness as the November event for the first time.

Editing can be a more grueling process than writing a first draft. To be honest, I’ve had it up to here (my hand is under my chin) with editing. I’ll gladly switch hats for the next thirty days.

To Display My Sincerity

My writer’s group has decided to change our April meetings from critique sessions to write-ins. We are also going to make the pilgrimage to Boise in order to write with our comrades in the Treasure Valley Group. They tend to sponsor a lot of write-ins in the local Barnes & Noble. A perfect situation, I get to write, and my wife gets to browse. Rather, she’ll say she’s going to browse, but will wind up with a stack of books at the cash register.

What Will I Write?

Well, I did not finish the draft of my second fantasy novel, “The Frozen War.” Although the first one, “An Easterly Sojourn” is not yet edited, I decided to start the second. Remember, you can’t edit a blank page. Of course how much better will it be that after publishing the first novel, I can jump right in and start editing the second one.

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The Best Part

I don’t mercilessly push myself during a NaNo event. There’s no sweating of blood or feelings inadequacy due to not meeting a goal. I simply look at the files at the end of the month and get a sense of satisfaction from a stack of pages that wouldn’t exist were it not for NaNo. That doesn’t mean that I approach it half-heartedly either. I simply allot more time for writing and attend write-ins.

What about you?

What writing project will you work on?

For the Sake of It: An #Indie-Author Dilemma

Should an independent author break with traditions and standards or follow them? That is the question. I can’t discuss all of them but I would like to mention that one shouldn’t do either if it is only for the sake of doing it.

When your heart, gut, and artistic judgment tell you to go in a particular direction, you should listen and do so. I’m sort of going through this situation with my editor. She’s insisting upon a trilogy that follows the exploits of my main character, the master thief Daggorat and his confidant Cyril the mage.

I can foresee my fantasy world of “Tyrhennia” giving birth to 12 or even 15 novels. Different characters, races, and Kingdoms of an entire world can support a long series.

A Thinking Man by Wesley Nitsckie used under CC Licence

Will there be a trilogy within that body of work? Perhaps there will be. I haven’t started to write about or even think about any other locations within Tyrhennia, so I can’t say how it will go.

My editor is not insisting on a trilogy because I’ve compacted too much in too few pages. I would understand that bit of wisdom and follow. However, she’s insisting on a trilogy because “That’s what everyone else does.”

I refuse to compromise the quality of my work for the sake of “what everyone else does.” I have two interesting plots for Daggorat and Cyril, and that’s all I see at this moment. I could have a flash of inspiration and move toward a trilogy. But as of now, forcing a trilogy would mean stuffing extra useless filler material into two novels simply for the sake of it.

Does The Godfather Part III or the latest movie trilogy based upon the Hobbit ring a bell? Francis Ford Coppola and Peter Jackson are no slouches when it comes to the director’s chair. Also, they have gobs of funding and skilled artisans working with them; and yet look what happened.

Always follow your heart and artistic intuition.

Are you ready to compromise your artistic creations simply for the sake of following everyone else?

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The Twilight Zone of Reviews (Part III)

 

I’ve discovered the danger of altering my basic writing style and subject matter. Normally, any short story of mine can be seen as a quirky tale laced with dark humor while delivering a very serious sub textual message concerning the downfall of Western Civilization.

I have one short story that deviates from my other works called Gematria². It’s not part of any collection because it is so different. However, that difference has turned around and bit me in the bum.

Like any other author, I have my favorites. Incredible wordsmiths who can make my jaw drop open and stun me. Two of those authors are Julio Cortázar and Jorge Luís Borges. For me, they are the unchallenged masters of the short story. Therefore it should come as no surprise that I had wanted to emulate them at least once. I couldn’t think of a better way to offer homage to a couple of my literary heroes. Thus, the short story Gematria² was conceived.

When I presented Gematria² to my San Antonio critique group, I was quite proud of the results and feedback. The hairs on the back of my neck tingled, when one member announced to the group, “This is a work of pure literature.” I knew that I had accomplished a very difficult writing goal. I had written a piece that successfully played with the notions of time and space laced together with Jungian synchronicity. All of those ideas and themes were delivered in true Rioplata style in less than five pages. In hindsight, I should’ve put more emphasis on the fact that some members didn’t have an exact opinion. They neither liked it, nor disliked it. However, their non-reaction should not have surprised me. Most North Americans and Europeans are not familiar with the narrative style of magical realism, and would be taken aback by its stark differences from the norms that they’re accustomed to reading.

This short story by Julio Cortázar called The Continuity of Parks is only two long paragraphs and can give you a quick insight as to how the concept of reality and fiction are toyed with in the Rioplata style.

Well, Gematria² has received its first review on Amazon UK…a three-star review. Huh! To add insult to injury, the review was left by one of my biggest fans. Double huh! That’s right, someone who discovered me on Facebook, purchased my works, and has left several glowing reviews was disappointed by this one.

My guess is there were two forces were at work. The first was caused by the same effect that the piece had on some members of my critique group. Gematria² was just too different for him. Second was the expectation factor. He had read all of my other works and was probably expecting more of the same, and was therefore disappointed.

I’m glad that I can laugh, smile, and write happily about these quirky encounters with the reading public.

Gematria² is available for free on Wattpad (no download required) and Smashwords .

Have a quick read and let me know what you think?

And don’t forget to get your copy of Ragged Souls

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The Queen and I: Working with your Editor

According to Stephen King’s On Writing, “The editor is always right.” My editor never misses an opportunity to remind me about that quote. Therefore I’ve created a system for editing, revisions, et al that prevents arguments about the placement of a comma or about the start of a new paragraph.

Editing a Paper by Nic McPhee used under CC License

I #write out my first draft and look it over for something glaring like misspelled words. Then I save the document to a memory stick and pass it off to my wife, a.k.a the Editor and Queen (Grammar Nazi is too over-used).

She will read it over and type in notes and comments with Word’s highlight tool. For suggested omissions, she’ll change the text to blue and will use red when she wants a stronger verb. I think you’re getting the idea.

The memory stick comes back to me and I’ll make the revisions, and pass the opus back to her. The process will repeat a few times before we present it to a critique group. Of course, when she says “get over here and give me that stick,” it has caused some confusion and has ignited spontaneous romantic sessions.

After the critique, she’ll compile all of the notes and then I’ll revise again. Then the piece is sent off for beta reading and the story will take its final form. See how sa3gk459Sj03*49jkwregpioj (sorry, the cat walked across my keyboard) easy it is?

What’s interesting is that throughout the process, my wife and I don’t usually discuss the revisions face to face. It prevents the fur from flying and maintains shalom (peace) in my home. Now I just need a way to keep the cat away from my desk.

Tell me about your #writing / working environment.  Anyone else have a live-in editor?

#Writing Motivation: Don’t Write!

Earlier today, an idea for a #shortstory came to me in a flash. Immediately I started making notes – even about foreshadowing and small details, which is not something I usually do. I’m dying to start slamming the keys, but I have to face the reality that I have too many stories in various stages of editing.

Carrot on a Stick by Ben Sutherland used under CC License

Some are completed first drafts and others are partially-written first drafts. Still more have had a few editing passes and have been presented to critique groups. But those critique notes still need to be compiled and addressed.

Therefore, although I’m itching to get started on Night Flights (a working title) I’m going to use it as the proverbial carrot on my writing stick. Better yet, it could be seen as a rap on the knuckles by Sister Atilla the Nun – “No dessert until you finish your carrots.” I need to finish all the stories I’ve started before I allow myself work on this one.

Besides which, Night Flights wouldn’t fit in thematically with any of my planned short story collections, or even my current release Ragged Souls . You can check out my recent Progress Report for details on those.

So in the end, I’ll continue to make notes as inspiration strikes, but this story will just have to wait.

How do you motivate yourself to write each day?

7 Tips: How To Write Better Dialog

So why am I writing a piece about dialog? There are two main reasons. First, I’ve noticed that even some of the best writers, i.e, those who can craft a great plot, create great characters, and write beautiful exposition, can write wooden dialog.  Sometimes the dialog doesn’t sound like the character, but rather like the author holding up cue cards.

Second, I’m a far cry from Shakespeare, but I almost always receive compliments on my #dialog from critique groups and beta readers. In college, my creative writing credits were in screenplay #writing, and I think that’s where I developed good dialog skills.

So here are #writingtips to help you out, if you find yourself struggling. Please pardon my occasional extreme examples, I just can’t help it.

Original Photo – Statues by Tim Evanson used under CC License – Chat Bubble Modifications by E. San Giacomo

1. Forget yourself and let the character do the talking

Remember, the reader will continue to read because the character is interesting. Therefore, bury your own ego and let the character say the things they would say under the circumstances. Of course you have to factor in the aspects of the character, like their age, gender, and education.

And the Lord ascended the mount, and upon seeing the gathering crowd, he turned to his disciples and said,”Yo Pete, got enough grub for all these folks to chow down?”

2. Forget the long speeches

Even if your character is giving a speech, remember to break it up with beats, like adjusting their posture, dramatically pausing, or taking notice of the crowd’s reaction. Dialog really needs to be short and snappy and complemented with actions.

Here’s a sample of a character giving a speech from my yet unpublished #ShortStory Little Red Revolution. Notice how I break up the speech.

John stood tall at the podium. “So the company has the nerve to call the latest contract an offer.” He shook his head. “Well, where I come from it’s called an insult!”

The crowd applauded and cheered.

“No more zeroes for our mining heroes!”

While John stirred hearts and minds, he saw a pasty-gray looking man skulk over to a dark shadow cast by a staircase along the back wall. With everyone’s attention fixed on the podium, John knew that he was the only one who took notice of the strange man.

This is quite different from the John Galt speech in Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand. It’s about 80 pages without a break.

3. Forget about grammar

Notice that I said grammar and not punctuation. Dialog has to be properly punctuated in order to be understandable. However, people do not speak in grammatically perfect sentences. Learn to ignore your word processor when it’s warning you about sentence fragments and other errors. “Okay?” See, that’s not technically a complete sentence, but it will work as dialog.

4. Don’t forget that you’re writing literature

When one character says something that makes the other character surprised, taken aback, or fumble for a quick response, show some sort of reaction other than another line of dialog.

“I‘m your father.”

“Really? I never would’ve guessed.”

“And I murdered your mother.”

“Let’s go get a burger and talk about the good old days.”

5. Don’t use forms of address

People just don’t talk like that, especially family members. I’ve seen it way too often where each character starts or ends their dialog by addressing the other character by name.

“Bill, I’ve got something to tell you.”

“I’m all ears, Bob.”

“Bill, promise you won’t get angry.”

“Only if you keep repeating my name, Bob.”

“I don’t do it all that much. Do I, Bill?”

“You certainly do, Bob.”

“Well Bill, I learned it from you.”

Of course there are times to use it, like a commander spouting orders, or a formal setting, or anger and frustration.

“Dammit, John,” Phil said as he threw the folder on the desk. “How many times do I have to explain this to you?”

6. Don’t forget to read and watch

Many self-help authors always remind us that a good writer does a lot of reading. True enough, but you can also learn something by actively watching a movie. Don’t underestimate the abilities of quality screen-writers when it comes to dialog. I can’t list all of them, but consider the following…

“The Thing” The original from 1951 by Howard Hawks and Christian Nyby.

“My Favorite Wife” (1940) starring Cary Grant and Irene Dunne

“Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid” (1969) d. George Roy Hill, starring Paul Newman and Robert Redford

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7. The dreaded info-dump dialog

This happens when a writer tries to create too much back story and character description through dialog.

Brandon held out his hand and showed the little box to Susan. Her eyes brightened at the sight of the gold foil wrapping and the intricate red ribbon adorning the gift.

“On this day, July 15^th, 2014, I’d like to present this gift to you on our thirtieth wedding anniversary,” Brandon said.

“As a retired English teacher, I appreciate your proper use of an indirect object pronoun after a preposition,” Susan said.

“Perhaps you should sit on the green chaise lounge and open your gift. It matches your eyes and accents your red hair.”

“Oh yes, remember? It was the robbery at the furniture store where we bought this lounge that started your career as a private detective.”

Of course I’m sure there are many other examples that you can use to fine-tune you own dialog. If you can think of a few more, please share.

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#Writetip: An Author Needs Beta Reads

Face facts, without a group of beta readers, your editing is incomplete. You can only do a certain amount of self-editing, at least 2 or 3 passes over your writing before you need the aid of some fresh eyes.

Open Book by Honou used under CC License

The best would be fellow authors working as a small support group, or a local writer’s guild that has a critique group. You can even try to create an on-line network of fellow #indieauthors.

Here’s what I’ve discovered about beta readers. They can point out things that just passed over your head. Those types of errors are easy for a writer to make because everything is clear to the writer, and sometimes it’s hard to put yourself into the mind of a person who knows nothing about your plot and characters.

When I presented the #shortstory Little Red Revolution to my critique circle, I thought that my main character’s attitude was clear.  However, the readers understood and perceived his anger and displeasure, but then questioned why his attitude changed so rapidly. I never intended for anyone to see a change until the final paragraph of part I, but all of the readers thought that the change occurred four pages earlier. Why? Because I had failed to clearly explain that the character also expresses his anger through sarcasm.

The readers thought he had become comical too quickly, a change that I did not intend. I’ve altered it based on their feedback. A good beta read can give your work a final polish and quality that the general reading public expects from a traditional publishing house.

Have your beta readers given you some insightful commentary?

Rolling the Flash Fiction Dice

I’ve decided to be a bit more of a traditional author instead of an #indieauthor in the trenches. I’m not talking about changing the route in everything I do, but rather just one aspect, flash fiction.

Find Dice Collection for Assemblage by Costanza used under CC License

I was never a big fan of #FlashFiction until a member of my critique group introduced it (yes Stewart, I’m talking about you). He’s quite talented in the flash venue, and I admit to being somewhat intrigued with a new outlet for my musings.

So what’s a writer to do with a new format? The answer is obvious, start using it.

I’ve penned two flashes so far called “Everyone’s a Winner” and “A Generous Man”. I really do not wish to include either of them in a small collection because neither fits in with my planned releases. I also do not want to give them away because the indie market is overflowing and bloated with free give-a-ways (another subject best suited for a future blog rant).

Therefore, the logical conclusion is to read about query letters, submission guides, and get ready to play the waiting game.

Have you ever attempted a more traditional publishing route?